Coming 30th july 2022
When you’re in shock and your heart paused in pain and we find pleasurable unpleasant, we feel like our world is in slow motion and everything seems paralyzed. There’s stillness of the soul yet troubled, unsettled, filled with questions and unimaginable. You question alot of things like believes, relationships and things like why am I here.
The cruelty of grief even worsen when people trade on your vulnerability, judge and say all sorts of things (every happening has a story right? and some people must tell). Don’t worry pain is inevitable to all it just comes in different forms and shades and now yours is served and this storm too will be over real soon. Hey take your time to heal don’t rush it, I wish I could tell you that there is a better way.
Sometimes the worst part of grief, shock or any form of heart break is when people ask you how long have you lost this person and you replied by 3 months ago or 5 years ago and they expect you to have been moving on or to live in the present without understanding that your present maybe that you’re still wallowing in sorrow or after effect of your shock or heart break.
The thing is most people who are grieving, in shock or heart broken might get to a level where the elastic limit of their emotions is surpassed and is broken , this is unintentional and people under this umbrella are bound to grief and pain and it might take time too. This is what brings me to Emotional sabotage(E.S). Emotional sabotage I must say maybe part of our unconscious mind, we could even engage in it without knowing it but I won’t cease to say that sometimes we in Slightest way consciously engage in it creating this huge obstacles that stop us from moving forward thereby not reaching our full potentials in life from all angles.
Most times we sabotage ourselves be it self or emotional we aren’t even aware of it. Having pointed these out I will like to take you through the Journey of my E.P: Emotional Sabotage (E.S).
Starting with the 1st song which actually is one of the backbones of this project and hence the title of this E.P today:
This song is dedicated to my brother who died in a car accident, What can I say about grief to every individual since we all grief differently and so the level of emotional sabotage will definitely be different. Could be better handled by you than me or the opposite consciously and unconsciously. My emotional sabotage started after I lost my brother, I thought all was lost until my father followed, I won’t even forget to mention that the pain felt was different for both but the two joined together had and still has different force on me. I saw life in different rays from all ramifications but life goes on they said. I felt like not only the world was revolving but as if everyone was staring at me, even I was scared of the wind. It might sound crazy but to the point where I couldn’t function emotionally (I was blank with the things I couldn’t explain) for those on this table I know I can’t tell your story better for you but I will like to say be consoled.
- Need you
Choose peace choose forgiveness in order
to be liberated and then you can move forward, accept what was and focus on the beautiful fragrance of tomorrow, hmmm trust me it smells nice. You can grief in times of death and after, other forms of heart breaks and griefs, learn from them and continue to travel down the journey of life, after all each day we grow older as of today you’re plus one in life experiences. So live don’t just be alive to tell yourself in the head how things won’t change because things will change and that will be for good. It’s okay, grief, go through it then heal, baby step sweetheart baby step. If there’s one thing any form of grief, heart break or shock teaches us, it’s compassion and shared human vulnerability at least so speak us when there’s need for it, believe me someone somewhere can relate.
- City boy
And I finally will like to believe that we made it, we left the pain and griefs behind but not the lesson. And now we can emotionally be strong and available for ourselves, physically functioning well and not sabotaging us. Whatever point you’re at this moment, Starting, middle, semi-finishing or finished congratulations still. Now I have no right to tell you how to react or feel but at any point you start feeling awesome, do not say it is too good to be true because it’s good and it’s true. You deserve all the love the universe has to offer
While you’re in the darkness of sabotaged emotions do not forget it’s twin flame called sparkling light!!! Preserve the light. Uj baby.
- Koni koni love
The point of this is in which ever way you’re heart broken be it as a result of loved ones to death, broken relationships of all forms do not forget that there are better days ahead. You can be careful for all you care but you’re not responsible for certain natural effects or even others bad behavior. When you’re heart broken in any form do not lock the door of your better tomorrow into the cold hand of the cause. Ofcourse you have the right to feel however you want to, handle it the way you can or even sabotage yourself but do not forget to move forward no matter how small by day. Do not sabotage your self as you say all are the same ( koni koni love) no they are not, even clothes get size, so you will find a perfect match and you will find peace. Do not give up on yourself not now not ever!!! Dare to live.